i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
We left the bar, went to a sex shop, bought penis shotglasses, went back to the bar and insisted that the bartender used them.
Apparently I joined a band last night. Definitely my favorite blackout.
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
We ended up at a lesbian bar and all my co-workers tried to get me laid. This is not how I envisioned coming out.
Thanks to that wedding, I got to use the term "finger bang" more than I have since high school.
there was a keg and pinata at my uncles funeral, and a bunch of scary looking biker dudes showed up to pay their respects. i need to strive to be more like him.
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
In hindsight, drunkenly yelling "I'M TICKLISH" might not have been an entirely wise decision
My idiot ex texted me on Valentine's day to tell me I was right, he did need a therapist.
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
ETA 20 minutes and if you greet me at the door with a gin & tonic I’ll give you head.
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