So My parents cut me off after I started making blood marys with hienz ketchup
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
She was shaking her boobs and I was so high all I could think was "breast maracas"
If the cops knock on your door and ask if you saw anyone throw an orange out the window I was never there.
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
I just sustained a forearm injury dancing to salt n peppa in my kitchen. Fack. I pushed it real good.
IF YOU HAVE THE CHANCE TO HIT THAT, AND YOU DON'T, I WILL FUCKING CRUCIFY YOU.
You're such a supportive sister.
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
I JUST SNEEZED WITH A MOUTHFUL OF CHEWED UP CASHEWS AND THEY CAME OUT MY NOSE AND IT HURT AND NOW I HAVE A LITTLE NOSEBLEED
Randomize