Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
he just booty called me in advance instead of waiting til 3 am when hes trashed. i think thats really considerate and gentlemanlike.
its taking every last moral i have not to steal this bike
you still have morals?
Well actually itd just be too hard to ride the bike with this large rake i just stole
You kept asking who was the good cop and who was the bad cop, you said you only wanted to talk to the good one
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
I woke up to a shot of jager next to my face. I felt bad for it so i drank it
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
I still have a little drunk in my system
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
Randomize
