i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
if i get the "i'm engaged" text one more time, i'm going to shoot myself in the face so my cats won't eat it when i die alone.
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
you're going to have to hot glue me into my dress tonight. there's no way out.
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.
I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.
I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
Woo is fucking right, dude. Vodka night tonight. Honestly, every night pretty much seeems like vodka night lately. My liver wants to move out of my body like I gave it an eviction notice.
Dick is dick
Look decision making is not my specialty
Which is why I just spent $33 on a breakfast sandwich coffee and hash browns
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
Randomize
