We need to get cat food
Nevermind, the cat will eat lucky charms
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
I woke up this morning with a hospital armband on containing all the information off my fake i.d. WTF did we do last night!?!?
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
We had to coat check the pizza.
i told him i was allergic to semen. he pulled out an epipen.
I achieved maximum drunk last night. It was pretty extreme. Woke up on a couch, outside, in a suit
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
Just please don't close your legs while I'm down there again. I don't want my death to be labeled as "Head crushed while giving an individual cunnilingus".
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
Randomize
