so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
upper decked the toilet at the restaurant that wouldn't let me pee there yesterday
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
I'm covered in salsa and facewash. I think I'm doing something wrong over here.
Just assessed the damage in the bath. Two love bites. One bruise on the inner thigh. Strange awareness of what i'm assuming is my cervix. I've definitely missed you. x
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
there's no food at this bar, but i'm pretty sure vodka is made of wheat so i'm basically drinking bread.
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
Climbing out Mr. Friday night's bathroom window. He thinks I'm puking. Be on state st. with the getaway car and if you could bring me a shirt and some advil that'd be dandy.
So proud. See you in five. I've got coffee.
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
OMG OMG OMG Ive hit the penis jackpot
It seriously took everything in my power not to sleep with him
What did it come out and serenade you? Lol
It sang to me in the dark. It was magical
Randomize
