i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
I bought beer tonight and got 3 coupons with my receipt. Paper towels, laundry detergent, and Advil. I wonder if Stop & Shop predicts the future or just does this with every beer purchase.
How are you feeling today?
i could've thrown up on command at any point today...
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
I just found a casserole dish in my oven filled with broken glass, blood, and chopsticks. And the REALLY fucked up thing is that finding it answered more questions than it raised.
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
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