The next morning she woke up and asked who I was and where she was.
Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
I'm in a strip club that reminds me of a crack house from the 80's.
I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
I can totally hide my daquiri in my sling.
did all my christmas shopping this morning at 4am drunk. never went to sleep. i was walking home drunk last night when i passed a target and saw 3 kids having a dance off. had to join. somehow they convinced me to go shoopping with them. i bought 4 disco balls and a lava lamp.
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen.
I’m at that point in my trip where I’m kinda hot, kinda cold and I have to remember to breathe.
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
Come over. Bring drugs. My sister is making cookies. She took Valium. They should be badass cookies.
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