did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
By this time tomorrow I expect us to be sitting at the kitchen table either playing a drinking game, or crying. Set an alarm
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
There's a very drunk Asian strawberry shortcake crying on the curb next to my truck. I'm not really sure what standard protocol is for this situation.
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
Woke up to a note written on my hand that read "just because he kisses you, doesn't mean you have to sleep with him"
next time, write it on your vagina so its more effective.
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
Rough day
Good thing I've started drinking again
Sorry for throwing up in your humidifier last night, I thought it was some sort of electrical garbage can
So many questions...the two most important are, where the fuck is my booze and how did you even get the couch through the door?
Having a bangable neighbor is going to ruin my booty call game. I refuse to go across town for dick now
Randomize
