Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
I'm like connect-the-dots of drunk. Whiskey, bourbon, vodka, rum, gin. The hidden picture is me faceplanting.
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
I just threw up in my front yard because my roommate was in the bathroom. Fuck New Years Day.
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
i spilled a box of white cheddar cheezits on the bathroom floor about 2 days ago. when i went back to the house he yelled at me from the bathroom: "THANKS FOR THE CHEEZITS, I'll ALWAYS HAVE A SNACK FOR WHEN IM SHITTING NOW!"
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
The fact that u had sex with a Disney prince blows my mind, you're my hero.
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
I am a unicorn in a field of flowers, you asshole.
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
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