so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
Whatever. We're stealing a penguin. Your not allowed near him... You did this to yourself.
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
Anything you tell me within three minutes of an orgasm isn't even being recorded in my head.
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
some how during sex we caught an ENTIRE pillow on fire. A WHOLE PILLOW.
I would use the term shit faced but I'm too polite for that
Wine and a Lunchable. That would be depressing if it wasn't the pepperoni and mozzarella one. Those are the shit!
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
I woke up in his closet, with my shirt inside out and backwards, Rolos in my hand, a tortilla with a face carved into it stuck to the fridge with a magnet, a homemade bong next to the bed, and the door off the hinges... I need a chaperone.
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