i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
Apparently mid blow job I started crying telling her how "Wonderful this blow job is"
I'm driving to work with an ice pack on my vagina. how was your weekend?
Did you wake up with "jello shots" stamped on your hand too?
He bought me a flower. He's totally getting head every day for a week.
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
Look, if he's not the brother with three nipples, I'm just not interested.
REALLY should have cleaned under my bed before I had my parents come help me pack...things my parents just found: several condoms and a bottle of lube. My mom when she found a condom: "ooo ribbed. Laura's a lucky girl"
Anxiously awaiting my period drinking Hershey's syrup from the bottle. Don't judge me
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
The whole time we were hanging out my vagina was yelling at me like its a real live penis that wants to have sex with us what are you doing
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
Randomize
