butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
I hope the prosecutor is a dude cause my lawyer is hot.
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
What are your plans?
Get picked up. Convince you to leave work. Smoke. Drink. Fly helicopters.
Im hitting on this chick at a stoplight when all the sudden. i notice this chick blowing some dude in the backseat.
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
THERE IS WEED IN MY OVEN. HOW AM I EVER SUPPOSED TO MAKE CHICKEN PARMESAN WITH WEED IN MY OVEN.
And the sexual frustration is like I'm wearing a damn horcrux
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
Judging from the sharpie on my face, glitter on my chest and women's tiger print panties i'm wearing last night was a thing.
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