I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
Kanye's agent is the only person whose job sucks worse than mine.
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
I was so high that i was talking shit about a girl I was with via text, and I handed the phone to her so she could type the shit I was trying to say.
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
it took me 20 minutes to get her upstairs... she crawled under a car and wouldn't come out.
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
I just found out my college boyfriend's nickname is actually a Dutch word for little cucumber.....it all makes sense now.
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
Randomize
