I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
I'm sweating so much right now i look like Whitney Houston
I'm at the perfect height to walk up to the corner of my mom's stove and rest my balls on it. Just thought you'd like to know they're warm.
Dude, double fisting packs of Ramen saved my life last night
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
All three of the bartenders here have screwed my boss, so he's definitely gay. Unfortunately for you he seems to have a type and you're not it.
Randomize
