apparently i walked up to the counter, put $30 worth of snacks next to this girl, and went 'uhh i have no money'
You were right. It hurts to walk today.
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
there is no way i can order from that cashier at in n out after she tried helping me while i was drunkenly puking in their bathroom at 11 am
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
Just woke up bloody and clutching a rear view mirror I'm pretty sure is from my car. For those of you keeping score at home this is why I stopped drinking four loko.
he signed me a blank check so today i get to decide if i want to be a saint or a millionaire
We went to Olive Garden so high we didn't talk and managed to be awkward enough for the waiter to ask if it was our first date
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
OKAY THAT'S CREEPY AND I'D PROBABLY ACCIDENTLY ORGASM
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
I'm eating ice cream out of my purse
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
Randomize
