We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
call me tomorrow and ask me about coke-whore stripper. It hasnt happened yet, but im sure it will be plenty disappointing.
If they ask for a stool sample we r no longer friends.
His body is like Jesus fingering me while I eat birthday cake
For future reference, Twizzlers CAN leave welts.
My brother is wearing glitter eyeshadow and split leg skinny jeans
You've been usurped as King of the Gays
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
And don't try to lose a condom in me tonight. My vagina is not a storage compartment where you can just leave something and try and use it again later in the week.
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
The problem I'm having with looking for jobs while drunk is reading is really hard
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
Are these your boobs on my camera?
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
Randomize
