Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
You were so calm and collected as you strolled out the door with 40 mcdonalds cups in your arms. It was legendary.
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
If throwing a bottle across the bar, hitting a skank in the head and not getting caught was an Olympic event, you'd bring merica the gold every time
Lost feeling in my face, my shoe and had a nose bleed. That's not wings. Fuck red bull.
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
HE LEFT ME THE DAY AFTER I LET HIM PEE ON ME. If you date him after that, I'll leave the fucking PLANET.
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
Randomize
