The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
She was wasted. Kept yelling "what if I'm pregnant" and trying to push me into the tree. First and last time I bring a girl to my family christmas party.
Woke up to the first three complete chapters of my new novel titled "If My Dick Could Talk" waiting for me on my laptop
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE GAY FRIEND?!?!
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
Worst case scenario, I put a giant cork in your vagina so you don't give birth before my birthday
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
I just had sex on my kitchen counter. It's like the American dream
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
I just learned in class that female whales slap their fins against the water and then ten males come and fight for her yet we can't get guys to text us back
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
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