you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
My roommate just called. He's in Miami and has no idea how he got there. He also has a ticket to Buenos Aires that he can't explain. I figured you'd have the explanation.
Everything tastes like hotdogs and shame.
I was about to send you a concerned-for-your-safety text b/c it took you more than ten seconds to respond to a text that mentioned both the bar and lesbians
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
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ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
I really don't think there's anything more liberating than farting.in a loud bar where no one.can.hear you
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
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