he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
did i really try to jack off an athens police horse last night? please tell me youre kidding..
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
You have to keep an eye on her tonight cause you know how she likes to pickpocket people when she's drunk.
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
Never let the horse trainer ride you, always ride the horse trainer. I have huge bruises on my thighs from his hip bones. That's how hard he rode me
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
there's still a lot i don't remember, like why my iphone's nailed to your wall
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