But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
I have a dream, to one day wake up next to a girl, walk to the washroom and kick her kids toys out of the way. That day has come, yes we can.
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
No I can't cure herpes. I'm an EMT, not Jesus.
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
Your dress got me laid by one of Obama's Secret Service members. Patriotic duty, check.
I give you full permission to seriously injure me the next time I think it's a good idea to face a bottle of vodka
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
My roommate just google searched "cumming blood" using my laptop. Her boyfriend is in her room, she looks scared. Words cannot explain how hilarious this is.
Randomize
