This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
Apparently oprah and I were in competition to see who's ass could get bigger this summer
Sometimes you gotta take the crosseyed stripper. fuck it
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
He wasn't lying when he said he was immune to pepperspray. He pretended it burned for like 12 seconds and told the cops he was kidding he was alright. We'll be there soon.
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
You put your name in his phone but not your number then screamed "Open the door!" and jumped out of the car
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
I just had the weirdest moment. Made eye contact at the bar with a girl who has seen my vagina.
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
I got back from work this morning after working the night shift to find an NFL player scaling the side of our apartment...from your window. He just took sneaking out to all new level. Care to explain?
I think that about sums it up, actually.
I just used a thesaurus to write a sext...
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize
