Your dad touched me again.
I'm sure that's not what the inventers of the Turkey baster had in mind, but that's what I had in mine.
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
And if it was a miscarriage you should figure out whose it was. He must be an alphamale for his offspring to sustain life this long in the amusement park that is your body
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
I don't want sex or anything I just really need someone to appreciate how shiny my hair is
Because bro, I don't want your dick being touched mid conversation.
Jesus Christ, it's not like going swimming. You don't have to wait 20 minutes after you eat to suck a dick
if you're wondering why I texted you some girl's name at 4 am it's because you wanted to Facebook stalk the girl who gave that Irish guy we met at the Chinese food place her license and said 'call me'
Randomize
