No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
I can't even use my hands i'm so hungover
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
I blacked out before two in the afternoon yesterday. Now that's a successful birthday.
Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
Its like a match made in avoid-eachother-because-we're-antisocial-and-awkward heaven
Where did you go?
I'm not really sure. They have flavored vodka. I like it and I'm never leaving. Ever.
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
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