There is a banner on a house by campus that says "welcome to college dads. Thanks for dropping off your daughters!"
time to smoke my breakfast
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
Every time I get scared about the fact that I'm falling for him I remember that he juggles and is hung like a mastadon and everything is a-ok.
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
You couldn't remember her number so you tried to dial her name into your phone. Once you realized you didn't know her name, you dialed 7 random numbers
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
He was the perfect gentleman on our first date. Took me out for candlelit dinner at a fancy restaurant, held open the door, walked me home, and made me cum three times before he got his.
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
Randomize
