I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
He just stabbed two olives and a pickle with a fork and deep throated it in front of my family
Not even marginally surprised
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
What's the rule on cocaine before dinner?
Its 11 o'clock somewhere
I pulled out moves I did not even know I possessed, our fucking de-throned gods
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
I really wanna just be like, can you just eat me out and stop whining
I think that would solve a million problems
quickly learned not to sleep with your roommate and work colleague in the same week
I never imagine I'd say this, but can I ask Jeff for the butt plugs back even though it was a gift and we broke up?
as a side note pls kill me
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