i just overheard my mom tell my dad he should drink less so he could hit the right hole
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
I am telling you that nothing wakes you up like stomach acid exiting your nostrils at 10AM
Found my wallet. It was under my dresser with a note that said "good job you found me". Drunk me is an ass.
MANGO MOTHERFUCKING GODDAMN MARGARITA DELICIOUSNESS
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
Did you drink ALL that 151??
No. We drank all the jaeger... Then used the 151 to start the fire. We're also out of paper towels... And your hairspray is flammable.
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
Just stole my moms weed, left a note saying sorry.. Hope she isn't mad.
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
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