Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
I feel like the fact that I slept with someone who dresses up like Batman a few times will never be lived down.
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
I came to the conclusion that Tinder and having the day off are not good for my relationship.
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
Just because I stayed up all night betting on Australian Horse Racing doesn't mean I have a gambling program.
last time we tried to watch a movie together, we ended up having really aggressive sex. during the Lion King. so what Disney classic will we be ruining this time?
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
Randomize
