He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
I got her a Nickelback box set.
who do I fuck, the girl waiting for me upstairs or her roomate making me mac and cheese right now?? This is the single hardest decision I've always wanted to have to make
I was cleaning up my drunken mess and I found my ID in a cereal box
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
Let me just say....i'm sorry about setting your carpet on fire. I had no idea that the paper towel would burn that quickly.
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
My drug dealer just asked me to go see Les Mis on Christmas. Should I be worried this is some type of musical set-up?
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
I woke up to an email from expedia confirming my flight to hong kong
I knew how blacked out you were when you started doing that thing where you dance around and call yourself the Black Swan.
Randomize
