It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
You fought the bouncer and lost, then challenged a hobo to a 40 chugging contest and lost. Sobriety is a good life choice.
I just saw that blonde chick you wanna bang rolling down the hall wearing a Thor mask..
Wow. We're meant to be..
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
I met my future husband in an elevator. Think Hispanic version of Dr. Bunsen Honeydew from the Muppets, but with eyes like Michael Fassbender.
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
She dumped me and then asked if I wanted to come to her improv show. Fuck theatre majors, man.
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
I woke up with glitter and eggshells in my bed wtf
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
He called my IUD an IED, and said that’s why I had bomb pussy.... I didn’t correct him
Randomize
