Dogs love guiness but it fucks up their kidneys
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
If I don't at least start a parade that spirals into drunken riots then I'm calling it a fail of a birthday
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
The cop busted in, made the music stop, and goes "GUYS LISTEN UP! DRINK, DO DRUGS, HAVE UNPROTECTED SEX, I DONT GIVE A FUCK, JUST QUIET DOWN!" Best. Cop. Ever.
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
You don't know happiness until you've got to smoke weed inside taco bell and then eat all you want for free
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
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