I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
This frat boy drinking a forty and wearing a pussy patrol shirt just ran out in front of my car. I should have used less brakes.
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
I got written up at work for smelling like sex and vodka. Still not sure how they put that into professional terms.
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
I would pay to watch a Bravo special of you getting Botox.
Literally every boy I've dated is now in a somewhat successful band. My vagina has obviously been blessed by the rock gods.
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
It’s a dick. Seen one, seen em all. Unless it spews a fountain of tequila, I don’t need to see yours.
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
Randomize
