he said my vag tasted like ravioli n pennies... i forgot I was on my period
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
He literally just walked in some random persons house and walked right to they're pantry. Then five minutes later he walks out with pop-tarts, mac and cheese, and captain morgan. We need to chill with this kid more often.
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
Look on the bright side. Now you know the number for poison control.
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
just had a woman ask me to donate my eggs so that her baby could look like me. don't know whether to get a restraining order or be flattered. thoughts?
Randomize
