i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
I'm crying at a bar by myself drinking a pear martini drawing things dicks are scared of. How was your day?
I just realized I slept with a guy who used the pickup line "do you have a bandaid? I skinned my knee when I fell for you."
I'm shopping for Mother's Day cards while waiting for my herpes medication. What is life.
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
Do you think he’ll fall in love with me if I tell him I have a nickname for his penis
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
She shouldn’t care what consenting adults do behind closed doors
You do realize it was her husband you were hooking up with behind that door, right?
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
Randomize