Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
i just farted in the library and heard some girl yell it was sulfur gas. can. not. move.
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
When the bouncer wouldn't let you back in you screamed "Authority is not given you to deny the return of the king!" and ran past him.
This was the first funeral I've ever attended where I had to pee behind a bush cuz someone was passed-out drunk in the locked bathroom. Steve would have been proud.
Randomize
