Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
I hid a 6pack in the microwave for later
I knew I liked you
some girl just asked me how to spell unconscious. I really want to know what she was texting.
and then when she swallowed her birth control with a shot of vodka and looked in my direction, i knew it was time to go.
Im so hungover that my 6 year old cousine made me aspirine and coffee out of playdoh...
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
I'm just gonna go nail your roommate after we break up anyway.
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
I'll check it out in the morning. Tonight has been reserved for getting baked and covering myself in kittens because THAT IS AN OPTION.
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
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