So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
You suck. You're fired. I need to find a less reasonable voice-of-reason.
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
Thank GOD those kids were having a lemonade stand, I didn't have anything to wash down my plan b with.
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
THE SUPER HOT BARTENDER WHO LOOKS LIKE RYAN GOSLING JUST WALKED IN. BUT HE DOESNT EVEN WALK HE GLIDES. LIKE AN ANGEL.
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
so this hot guy who looks like brad pitt circa troy era in my physics lab is staring at me right now and it's taking all the willpower I have not to procreate with him right now.
Randomize
