She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
just crush a couple of percocets into it. tell him sam adams came out with a new beer. flavored with sleep.
Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
She was just a sweet cute intern for us until I saw her naked in my bed the day after the Christmas party
We had to take the hinges off the bathroom door. Needless to say, you are no longer welcome at that bar
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
He made me watch a sex tape him and his gf made. They were in the shower when her roommate walked in on them. Not kidding: she asked to join in.
I hate him. He gets laid, my dick gets laughed at.
we were all too drunk to realize that the cat wasnt yours
Dude, I need a fuckin wingman and this could finally make us eskimo brothers, how can you pass that up?
Why is the microwave staring at me?!
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