I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
Is there any chance I can see you without pouring vodka on your head?
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
I am too young to be this hungover
Is this your way of saying you want a sober 19th?
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
I mean, he's 40, foreign, artsy but with substance abuse problems and estranged children. How is he not my type?
Status: mom bitching about grandma not shutting the fuck up, while not shutting the fuck up. Dear Jesus give me strength or more bourbon.
Your ex roommate is making out w the kid who pees on floors and it's kinda funny
Everyone else's "needs" are getting in the way of my alcoholism.
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
Randomize
