margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
Reggie can tackle my bush.
The freshman came home at 9 this morning with one heel, no pants, and a strangers sweatshirt covered in tequila-scented vomit. I think we're done corrupting her for a while.
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
The next time you try to involve a tickle me Elmo in my orgasm, I'm leaving you
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
You tried to ride his dick and fell off. Then tried to ride the floor. That's why he hasn't called back
I made an executive decision to rename my Resume file to something other than MONEYMONEYMONEY.
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
Randomize
