From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
Dude this breakup has officially hit rock bottom. sitting around watching women's NCAA basketball instead of going out
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
You overflowed the toilet cuz you tried to flush apples. you said they were singing too loudly
Apparently being drunk on a southwest flight and yelling "TURNUP" during take off is looked down upon in this state.
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
Surveying the reception hall and I'm fearing the worst possible thing that could ever happen...this might be a dry wedding.
.,.,you might have to leave
I'M MAKING HIKING PLANS WITH THE GIRL WHO IS DATING MY EX, THAT IS PERSONAL FUCKING GROWTH
The only way I'll cross anything off my to do list today is if I write 'eat melted cheese' on it
I'm sitting in the shotgun seat of my car on full recline trying to pretend everything is ok
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
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