Stars make me really horny. Especially that shiny one its just staring at me.
At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?
Right after we had the just friends talk..
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
I had to convince you not to write "happy birthday to the first guy who fingered me" on his facebook wall, right above the post from his current girlfriend's mother.
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
Wrapped in a blanket, just ate a whole party pizza. All my dreams are coming true and you don't even care.
Everyone heard you having sex but I just told them you were having a nightmare.
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
Randomize
