Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
My mom just came into the kitchen and watched me take a double shot of whiskey and chase it with a beer and said "you are my son." Proudest family moment ever
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
alright well Taco Bell Closes at 12 so you better pray to god she's asleep by then or I'm running in your house butt ass naked with a bag of tacos
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
For future reference: bathtub full of cheeseburgers = win.
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