She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
bitch so ugly she owes me an erection
i just saw a girl w/ a shirt that said "im the single friend." yeah i bet u r. stop wearing shirts like that and that could change.
While I was banging her, her cell rang. She checked to see who it was, answered it, and moaned, "I'm dumping you."
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
Thanks for buying me a sippy cup, its so pretty and everyone keeps telling me its probably the best gift anyone could have given me
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
It's not Christmas until you get a photo from an ex wearing a Santa hat and red boxers... And then you just respond with, "nope."
Do you think showing up at his door with bourbon and chicken is too forward?
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
Randomize
