no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
Riding home in a carseat. Worst. Night. Ever.
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
I've spent the last three hours watching 30 rock and eating marshmallows and ham. I'm considering taking up weed to justify my lifestyle.
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
drunk grocery shopping was not as bad of an idea as i thought, this salmon cat food tastes a lot like tuna
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
I wish I could take a screenshot of how things literally look from my eyeballs right now
He's ready to settle down, whereas I'm like "More shots please"
I don't think it's a coincidence that the day I just happen to do the splits at the gym I come back with 7 guys' phone numbers.
Just left the ER. Only good thing... my hot ass nurse Carlos stripped me.
God works in mysterious ways.
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
Randomize
