you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
i mean really, i cant compete with a cucumber
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
He told me to pick a safe word. I said 'cactus' and he said I wasn't taking this seriously and that I wasn't cut out for s&m.
After she cried and passed out at four in the morning, I had a very lovely, very drunken conversation with her mother while decorating a cake into the shape of a penis.
FOund a bunch of old fireworks spring cleaning.
Who is our new insurance provider?
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
I met his dad. Turns out he was a one nighter from the nurses conference in Vegas. Not sure how to handle this one.
Clearly, you already have. Both of them.
My girl came home. i was jacking off on the couch and she just starts telling me about her day, as if im not half naked with my hand on my cock.
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
Next time we smoke please remind me to put my bong back in my build a bear box. My mom says if I leave it out one more time she's keeping it for herself.
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