Public safety found my id!
And i can't find my bra so i'm assuming they found my bra with my id which would explain the disapproving tone the lady on the phone had.
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
I miss vodka workout Fridays
i'm not entirely sure that 'not getting kicked out of the bar until it got dark' really classifies as 'doing better'
My TA just came over to give us drugs. Now he's drinking grey goose with my roommate and explaining his thesis to her. This is too much.
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
I just tried to eat one of my ear plugs, thinking it was a cheese curl. I need it to be break RIGHT NOW.
We're over by the bouncy castles. I'm the one wearing a baby. Bring Twizzlers.
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
I think the cashier could tell I was sad. All I bought was penis shaped food and chocolate
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
Randomize
