So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
He played with my vagina like it was a turntable
I want you more than these girls want KFC
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
I can't wait until next week, when I find out what drunk me added to the Netflix queue.
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
Then she looked me straight in the eyes and asked me if I missed my foreskin. Weirdest conversation ever.
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
So in my DUI class I had to write down 3 people I'd call if I needed to talk and why...they all want to meet you now...
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
I can't be a daydrinker without you. It just doesn't work.
I love you too.
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