Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
Things I woke up with this morning: half a mcmuffin, orange hair, one shoe and a friendly german man. Tequila was a brilliant idea.
If after tonight I can still walk on my own, take me to another bar.
I let a naked juice spill down my leg for like 30 minutes bc i thought i was hallucinating that my leg was cold.
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
Hey, I think I showed you a picture of my nephew while we were fucking last night. Sorry, I know it's weird, I just really love that kid. Again, sorry.
Just looked for hours for the remote. Found it in my purse. I need to drink less.
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
Randomize
