"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
you threatened to puke on the table cause they didnt serve eggs Benedict
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
Dude she let me install handle bars on her headboard. I should have nailed my boss years ago.
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
I'm high and I have a consensual booty call on the way and just thought that it was a good time to let you know that I think that you are a stellar person.
Apparently she almost had an affair at Outback Steakhouse, details to follow when I get home but the apple really doesn't fall far from the tree
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
MY DAD KEEPS LIKING PORN LINKS/ALBUMS ON FACEBOOK AND THEY ALL SHOW UP IN MY NEWSFEED
Thank you for dog sitting, there is $60 on my desk to be spent on DRUGS AND/OR GAS ONLY not that food stuff people crave.
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
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